Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Walk Of Shame

"Hello. I am staying at another hotel, but last night I had some drinks in your restaurant. I met three ladies there, had fun in the bar, and then went upstairs to have more fun with one of the girls. When I left in the morning, I left my Movado watch in her room. I would like to try and get that back."

"Ok, let's try calling her room. What was the room number?"

"Don't remember."

"Well then, what is her last name?"

"Don't know."

"How about her first name?"

"Sorry. No idea."

"Well, what do you know?"

"I know she is from LA. She said her flight leaves today at 6pm."

"Awesome. We'll take your name and cell number and let you know if anything turns up."

Around 4pm, the dude comes down to sit in the lobby and wait facing the elevators. Our staff anxiously awaits to see how this love story turns out. About fifteen minutes later she comes down with her friends on the way to the airport! He walks up to her as they both turn red and exchange an awkward hello again kiss. They sneak off to a dark corner away from her friends and the watch is returned. With heads hung low, they go their seperate ways.

I love happy endings.

Thursday, October 2, 2008


Usually our rates go from about $200 to $350 depending on the season and how busy we are. On the rare occasion they go down to $100, we get guests who are comparable to the audience members of the Jerry Springer show.

The other night I had a young couple come to the front desk.

"How old do you have to be to stay at this hotel?" This is never a good sign. After I told them they turned to each other with a conspiring look and then asked for a room for two nights.

"Sigh, ok. The rate is going to be $239 per night. I'll just need a photo id and a credit card?"

"No thanks. I want one of your $40 rooms."

"Oh, are you referring to the sign by the door?"

"Yup. And I don't have a credit card, only cash."

"The sign that says '$40 Overnight'?"

"Yeah, does that include tax?"

"Sorry the room rate is $239. The sign is for the garage's rates. If you finished reading it you will see that $40 will get your car parked for the night."

"Oh. No $40 room?"

"No $40 room."

"Oh. That sucks."

Unsurprisingly, this is not the first time I've had this conversation.